That dreaded word…

What does being vulnerable mean to you? Is it something that just happens naturally, or something that you consciously avoid?

“The quality of being vulnerable, easily hurt, influenced or attacked”.

Cambridge Dictionary.

There is a hell of a lot of emphasis for humans to be “vulnerable” with one another, but as I ponder the idea of vulnerability, I’m pondering, what does one truly gain from being vulnerable, if the essence of its meaning is to be hurt, influenced or attacked?

Vulnerability has been a theme (of many) in my life for as long as I can remember, and as I consciously and subconsciously strive for personal and spiritual growth, this dreaded word keeps rearing it’s not so cute head at me.

Partners want us to be vulnerable, but why? Being vulnerable can have different meanings to each individual, yet, the meaning is still the same! To be vulnerable means to leave us open. Leaving us open means we are allowing others to hurt, influence or attack us.

Why do we have to be vulnerable? Can’t we just be open and aware? Aware of self, aware of others, aware of energies, aware of our surroundings and of our inner intuitive awareness? It is crucial to understand that being “vulnerable” can be costly to our spiritual and personal developmental, our progress and our achievements.

How many of you have been attuned to your higher self and following your cosmic paths only to meet someone and all of a sudden, you are laying awake at nights wondering how you ended up being a hot mess with someone who undervalues you and sucks the life and energy out of you?

Would we allow our children to be vulnerable (easily hurt, influenced or attacked) by someone who threatened their happiness, stole their joy and made them feel that the world and relationships are unsafe? Nooooo…

Vulnerability is not something to be ashamed of. Let me make that clear. But the point here to remember is that being vulnerable with the right person can be very rewarding indeed. But how exactly do we know that our vulnerability is safe with someone that we choose?

Should we allow the child within us to feel trapped in a distorted belief that being vulnerable is a good thing? Depends on the situation and the level of awareness of our partners.

Freeing your inner child from the distorted beliefs that we have created through our life experiences helps us to reframe our understanding of what being vulnerable truly means to us. Being vulnerable shouldn’t be encouraged like it’s an expectation and prerequisite for being in relationships. Unless of course this is reciprocated.

Our inner child is the core of our being. It’s where we find joy and peace, innocence and freedom, care and understanding, compassion and love, burrowed deep within our soul.

Our inner child is the essence of our very being and is in need of nurturing and protection from the things that hurt, influence or attack us.

Our inner child is who we hide from the world from a fear of being vulnerable to the things that threaten our survival. Fear of being wrongfully hurt, badly influenced or physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually attacked.

How do we overcome the social norms and relationship expectations of vulnerability?

Just. Don’t. Do it! Don’t be vulnerable. Vulnerable is not cute. It’s scary, frightening, ugly, draining, and unhelpful.

Instead, be authentic. Be brave. Be strong. Be loving. Be kind. Be caring. Be compassionate. Be firm. Be authentic. Be free. Be you! Just don’t be what others say that you need to be. You know better than anyone else that you are the maker of your life!

You hold the power and strength within you to stand up to others who tell you that you’re too much of this and not enough of that. That you need to be more vulnerable or less needy. You are not too much and you are not enough of anything for anyone, except to a snotty, under evolved narcissist who is projecting what they are lacking on to you.

You. Are. Perfect. Just the way you are. Where you are on your journey is exactly where you are meant to be. You should never jump through timelines or hoops that doesn’t resonate with you for someone who lacks the respect and authenticity to love you as the perfect and divine, beautiful creature that you are.

Be you. Be authentic. Be happy. Be free.

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